Thinking about sex all the time is not the greatest of things. Having to constantly think where your next shag is coming from is what prevents men from doing complicated actions such as multitasking. This is why I envy the sexual naviety of most females, especially Asian women. The female brain is not wired to think about getting laid all the time so they can get on with their day think about important matters such as what clothes they want to buy or whether they look fat. By not getting laid all the time, Asian women tend not to know the pleasure of an orgasm and won't actively seek it. They don't know the joys of having oral sex performed on them or what the multiple orgasm feels like.
It's a problem having to think of sex all the time and especially with my mother around. It feels like a second childhood all over again for me living with my mother. I don't have any 'alone time' to pop my rocks off, since she so f*cking scared I will fail she insist she be around all the time. I cannot close the door and say to my mother, "Can you give me five minutes alone? I'm going to spank the monkey."
It's frankly becoming a problem. I started to view some of my single female friends as 'potential girlfriends' which is frightening. I know in my mind there is no way I want a relationship now or that a relationship will sustainable. I know that for me a relationship should be the last thing I need. Yet in my heart I want one. Not just because of the sex but also for the companionship. When you've spent most of the your teenage years and adulthood without somebody you can love, it tends to nag on your mind.
Many factors prevent me from pursuing a relationship - how the other will handle my depression and the fear of rejection.
I think all through our loves, everybody wants to love by someone. We not out there to find the most beautiful, the smartest, the wealthiest or the funniest. We just want to fine THE ONE, that is all.
In one simple phrase - I'm desperate and I know it and it saddens me.