I thought I could get through my internship without having a nervous breakdown but it was too good to be true. The previous nervous breakdown was caused by my inability to take blood from an elderly patient. This time the cause was the grief I got from the medical officer on-call.
I would like to state most of the medical officers in my current hospital are very nice. They don't scold me much if I do things wrong and when it is possible try to teach me when I do go wrong. Yet there is always one bad apple which spoils the crop. This person has a Jekyll and Hyde personality about him/her. Sometimes this person is OK but all of a sudden can turn on you. This medical officer always bitches about everything I do when I admit a patient. If it is not a poor management order, it is my clinical skills. If it is not my clinical skills, then it is my attitude.
I don't mind being told off and I do admit I'm not totally enthusiastic about paediatrics. Yet there is way of telling people instead of screaming and pointing at the management order, saying "This is not good enough!" There is a tactful and considerate way of telling interns what they have done wrong and maybe they will learn if you don't scream at them so much.
Why is it so many senior doctors forget what it is like to be a medical student or an intern? Have they risen to such lofty heights in their white towers? I never have been in favour of the Gordon Ramsay method of teaching people, that is to scream at them and humiliate them. I always been in favour of making them feel part of the team. If a junior team member does something wrong, tell them off but make sure they learn what they did wrong.
I often wonder if I will continue in this job. I'm seriously thinking about not joining any training after my internship has finished.